Ha ha ha. I sooo know how that feels. We used to name our Xerox production equipment after ex-employees, and their corresponding traits. If you were a hard worker, you might get a DocuColor named after you. It sounds funny, but I think it worked out quite well. In a room full of production machines, it's easier to tell them apart if they all have names, instead of DocuColor 252 #2. Besides, it's more fun to hear "Is Jody busy?" instead of "anyone using the left DocuColor 252?".
That was quite a while ago, before I got into purely offset. I tried naming my presses, but it didn't seem to work as well. So now you hear "'use the Polar cutter.' 'which one?'
'the one on the left'".
We had a guy handling our machines when we were running Konica Minolta, he wasn't quite up to it and we let him go when we found him doing his own little side business on our machines. He's now referred to as Komica.