I think a lot of shops sell print as a "commodity". They are the "order-takers" and producers, and, the customer is the "buyer". This naturally sets up an almost adversarial relationship, when, really, it doesn't have to be that way. By transacting business in this manner, you miss out on the opportunity to create long-term relationships and revenue streams.
Instead, try working with your customer, as part of their team. For example:
Ok, what is your budget? Let's see what we can do to get as close as possible.
You've specified 80# Cougar Opaque Text. Here, look at this paper, it's half the price, but, I challenge you to tell me the difference. We can save some money there.
The way you have your art set up, you're asking for a 5-color plus PMS. If we switch that to a 4-color process, we can save some more money there. I doubt if you would be able to tell the difference, etc, etc, etc.
Anyway, you get the idea.